Do I have Self-Love Deficit? Am I Codependent?

Determining whether you have a self-love deficit or if you're exhibiting codependent behavior can be complex and may require self-reflection and possibly professional guidance. Here are some signs that you might be experiencing issues related to self-love deficit or codependency:

1. Putting Others' Needs Before Your Own: Do you consistently prioritize others' needs and desires over your own, even to the detriment of your well-being?

2. Difficulty Setting Boundaries: Do you find it challenging to set and maintain healthy boundaries in your relationships? This could involve saying "no" when necessary or expressing your own needs and desires.

3. Low Self-Esteem: Do you struggle with feelings of worthlessness or inadequacy, seeking validation and approval from others to feel better about yourself?

4. Fear of Abandonment: Are you deeply afraid of being alone or abandoned by others, to the point where you'll tolerate unhealthy or even abusive behavior to avoid it?

5. Difficulty Making Decisions: Do you rely heavily on others to make decisions for you, feeling uncertain or anxious when faced with choices on your own?

6. Feeling Responsible for Others' Happiness: Do you believe it's your responsibility to make others happy or to fix their problems, even at the expense of your own well-being?

7. Caretaking Behavior: Do you frequently find yourself taking care of others' needs or rescuing them from difficult situations, often to the neglect of your own needs?

8. Enabling Behavior: Do you enable unhealthy behaviors in others, such as addiction or irresponsibility, by protecting them from the consequences of their actions?

9. Difficulty Expressing Emotions: Do you have difficulty expressing your own emotions or asserting yourself in relationships, fearing conflict or rejection?

10. Seeking Approval and Validation: Do you constantly seek approval and validation from others, basing your self-worth on external feedback rather than your own intrinsic value? Do you need to be needed?

If you find that several of these characteristics resonate with you, it may be helpful to explore these patterns further. Working with a therapist can provide valuable insight and tools for developing healthier patterns of relating to yourself and others.

Remember, recognizing these patterns is the first step toward healing and growth.

P.S. As I develop my website, I will be adding a resources page for those interested in learning more of each topic discussed on these blogs.

To those “hanging with me” and actually reading far enough to see this note, Thank you for your patience!